Do you ever get away from a conversation and come back to it in a while, realizing people are still talking and none of them had an idea that you weren’t even among them? I do. Had it so many times, usually its during a boring office meetings, when I’m not even needed but i still have to sit through it cause the rule books says so. Anyhow, i have had this kind of experiences so many times, that i often wonder what if someday someone asks me something while am gone.
Someone: so what do you think? should we say yes or no?
Me (just back from my trip to nowhere): Hmm, i um think Um …aa Um what i believe.. Um
Someone: are you okay?
Me: (Thanking someone sincerely for the solution): no no.. yes, i mean no. . You know what…Am just not feeling that good. i think um ..Excuse me all i need to get some air.
Someone & everyone else (with concern for poor me): yes yes, please take a break. We will update you.
This is what i think should be my best self defense against a situation caused by my ability to vanish from conversation having around. I’m not trying to be funny or sound creepy; but i really do end up talking to voices in my head or plan a page or two for my story, while people are having conversation around. Sometimes i have even tried to ask the voices questions on things and people around.
My last act vanishing from a conversation took me to my story and its development process, but the one that happened before that was actually weird. I was discussing (or rather these people were discussing) some issues being faced by one of the guys in office with the server of a site, for which he was adding the content. I already knew what the discussion was as I was told by the team before they called in the project manager and repeated the story. So the guy starts with his story and i nod and nod and boom i walk away from the scene. I ended having a small talk with myself.
Me (looking at the one who was telling story of sad demise of the content he added in late 24 hours): with little weight loss he can look damn good
Myself: yeah agree on that
Me (looking at two guys sitting nearby looking something on their system): why are they smiling? What’s so funny on their system?
Myself: seriously? Don’t you think you should listen to this guy over here?
Me: I’m jealous… i never get to find anything funny online, when am working
Myself: stop making faces you moron, he is sayings something
Me: am going…okay… i know what he is saying. He added content, it got deleted, and he added again, it got deleted again. The guy upstairs says server issue. What’s new?
Myself: Silence and rolling eyes
Trust me this happened. Guess that’s what happens when the work you once loved, the place you once loved turns into weird, sad and a stranger. Sometimes i look at myself sitting at my desk, with my head in my hands as i stare at the screen. Reminds me of the first few minutes of the movie “Wanted”, where that guy works everyday at a place he doesn’t want to be yet he is there. He hates every minute of his job but he is there everyday, till one fine day Angelina Jolie comes and he is being chased by bad guys and guns etc etc…That’s when he quits his job. Only in my case, there is no Angelina Jolie or anything like that.
So, i guess i will continue with my art of steering away from conversations going around me. I believe, people who can picture themselves from outside as a bystander know what shit they are in. On the bright side, i have a talent to walk in & out of a conversation without anyone knowing…!! Yayee!!