Believe me when i say this, I once dreamed of a wedding day… a day I was surrounded by people happy, cheering and enjoying the music. It was my wedding day, I was happy and the one I was getting married to was standing right there in front of me… smiling and looking at me. I could see those eyes trying to tell me it’s all okay, that I’m safe and I will never get hurt ever, and that there are no tearier nights left in my world.
It was a dream I can never ever forget, there are so many dreams that I remember with such clarity that sometimes I wonder why I never used this kind of memory in my education phase…I could have done so good. While most of the dreams that I remember, with utmost clarity, are dreams which have haunted me for days with a touch of sadness that wasn’t easy to wash off. But this one dream, it was like the best thing that ever happened to me. When I woke up realizing that it was just a dream and the probability of it coming true is zero, i thought “O man! I’m going to go blue again”. But, I didn’t get sad, I wasn’t in tears and there was this strange happiness inside. I guess I was happy to live that dream, because I knew I could never have what I had in those couple of unconscious moment. I wasn’t just in love, I was getting married.
Yes, I m one of those girls who want to get married, who dig the idea of living with the other half for the rest of her life and do nothing else but wake up to that face every morning. O believe me I can do that, only life is a mean and dirty player. It plays games with you in such ways that you know, no matter how hard you try you are bound to lose or get a good penalty. In short, life won’t let you have it easily or just won’t let you have it at all.
It was a bright sunny autumn morning, I was happy, there was music and my eyes were staring right into the most beautiful eyes in the world. I was staring at a face happy to see me, a face telling me everything is going to be okay now…everything. I don’t know how I didn’t cry that morning, but every time I think of that dream now I cry. Not because I dreamed of my wedding, no…I cry because I wish I could dream that one dream again. But it won’t happen, I mean I have recurring dreams of being in war, falling from a hill, being stuck in a stupid elevator or being left by someone I love, but I know I will never have that dream again.Wtf!
I belong to the dark and twisted category, because I’m one of those who don’t have the luxury to fall in the color of love…!!