Voices: So let me get this straight, you have signed up for NaNoWriMo?
Me: what do you want?
Voices: And you plan to join Guitar classes?
Me: Dude! Not today.
Voices: No No, I’m just trying to understand.
Voices: Story writing and guitar classes while going to work every day?
Me: What do you want?
Voices: Me? Nothing, but you might want an insurance for the Body and probably some pills in your bag for you.
Voices: And of course if possible buy a gun, because you would want to shoot yourself in few days for all this.
Voices: See? I never ask for anything, I’m just your well wisher. Always helping you, guiding you.
Voices: And one more thing, do not forget all this should not affect your daily every morning workout. Health is wealth. Right?
Voices: You Body is right, you are so thoughtful. Sniff! Sniff! Tears. Sniff! Look they are real.
It wasn’t a nice day, something has snapped inside and it is taking time for me to fix it. I woke up with the worst mood and I worked with the worst headache all day. The whole mood plus late night added to my misery. Leave the mood, I’m always like this, but one day of late night and I was in hell how would I manage my NaNoWriMo? I don’t want to quit before it starts.
Today when I reached office, i was at in my car looking at the building wondering why I didn’t wanted to get out of my car. I just sat there for few minutes begging myself not to drive away because that’s what I wanted to do. Just drive away. I’m not liking myself today, because im acting like the person i was, the person i do not wish to be and would never be.
I don’t have a story, i might have one but, i don’t have something that is good and would go beyond 50,000 words.
I need a break, like a big one from work from thinking from whole heaviness inside me.