Have you ever had a moment, when you absolutely know what you want but are 100% sure nothing and no one can make it happen? I live with this moment every second of everyday, which is why I prefer to hide behind layers of lies and pretenses.
Well I managed to survive Monday without a hitch but now as I sit alone in my couch, looking at the time and thinking few hours of rest before I wake up and wear a smile again, I can’t help but wonder how these few 8-9 hours of my night-time are the only hours I’m true, honest and myself.
“I’m the ghost of the girl that I want to be the most” are just lyrics but sometimes it’s like my reality. I wish magical land, fairytales were true, and wish there was a potion to make everything perfect and okay. But, the only time I see okay is when I’m dreaming a happy dream which happens rarely. Even my dreams are mean to me most of the time. I don’t know why I’m so blue right now, probably it’s because truth sometimes like to sit next to me and not leave till am annoyed to the core, broken to the bone and torn apart like dried leaf blown away by wind. And it was one of those days when I was living under the cloud of reality, when even fiction and music couldn’t make me feel safe. A part of me wants to write and work on my stories, so i cant just get lost in a different world, but its too late and i have Gotham in morning.
Good thing, Revenge is back, PLL is here too and hopefully other shows will return too by this week.
Truth never sets you free; it just throws you somewhere you can’t get out of…!!!!