Have you felt ever you are not one person? That there are two people living inside you, one messed up and other one sanity keeping you from falling over the edge. I think I am two people, a part of me is sad so sad that it usually stays sad and hates everything while the other one loves to laugh, smile, is nice to everyone and wants no part of blues around.
I want to dedicate Avril’s song Darling to myself because I wish someone would just say those words to me, tell me its okay.
My head hurts right now and with blurry wet eyes its hard to see what I’m writing. The sane part of me begs me to sleep while something inside says watch one more episode. So I watch back to back episodes to shutdown and turn off the good and bad me arguing.
Today I said something to a friend of mine and I think I scared her. She treats me her as her kid and is usually worried about me. I didn’t mean to scare her.
Its 3 am and I’m thinking donut or chocolate icecream. I wonder why I don’t have icecream in my fridge.
Among the various reasons why I’m blue and angry all the time, is also the fact that I feel like a thankless fool who has everything yet who cries unhappiness.
But, sometimes we hurt even when we didn’t fall…!!!!
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