Not because i was shy…!!!!

Dear Diary,

How are you?

Do you still carry?

All the words

I wrote to you

Is the world

Inside

Still has the girl

Who used to hide?

From every face

Every eye

Not because

She was shy.

Do you keep

Those secrets

I scribbled

With hate

And anger

Of being lonely

Different

& ugly

I hope not.

Every thought

I wrote

Wasn’t real

But the fear

Those tear

Drops on the corner

Of blotted ink

Were a different

Story

Of pain and worry

Friends i lived with.

I remember diary

Very clearly

I was lonesome

A forlorn little

Girl

There were some

Confessions

Many painful expressions

You listened

You took them all

With you there

Was no wall.

I hope

Its safe

The confession made

The secrets said

The truth whispered

The darkness shared.

You knew me well

You knew both

Hyde & Jekyll

Living inside me

For i was never free

Of pretending

Smiling & nodding

When all i wanted

Was to be mend

For i was broken

Fallen

Pieces of dejection

Seeking affection

For the other me

The one hidden

Behind the smiles

Driven

Miles

Away from everyone.

For no one

Gets it

I think

I wrote

All that

& more.

Are there any

Happy words?

Maybe not many

But a few threads

Of peachy lines

Saying things like

Im fine

Sky is blue

Trees are green

World is not

Always mean.

Diary

There is no way

I never wrote of

A happy day

Im sure i did

I remember

Smiling & dreaming

Or were they

Dreams for real

Not a memory

Scribbled down

Among the many

Frowns

I drew

On you.

Diary i need

You to read

Me

Few of those

Love songs

I wrote

In the world

Of right and wrongs

I fell

Hard in love

Broken

From toe to above

I was happy & in pain

For i saw rain

Of sorrow & ache

A heart so broken

No one wants to take.

I loved

But truth was shoved

Down my head

You follow the thread

Not a step away

So i did

I hid

Inside your arms

Holding your face

Diary you were my saving grace.

For i had a journey

Of a withering tree

Standing tall

Yet not free

In you i was hiding

From the big blue sky

Not because i was shy…!!!!!

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