I think coffee has stopped working on me..Zzzz…!!!!

Life has its own way of saying “hang on, its going to be okay”…

After two days of effn mood and effn thoughts, I found a moment of happiness and smile today. After a long time I had dinner with friends who know me for real and love me with all my darkness.

Don’t know how will I wake up tomorrow, sad or super sad or effn sad? But right now, right this moment I feel blessed.

Goodnight world!

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Suffering from an acute case of Monday blues…!!!!

I have had a bad day, I want to use an eff word but am going to be decent. Its 3am and something tells me tomorrow ain’t going to be pretty either, but its okay. I needed this. I mean I have just spent past few minutes writing a page of a story that came to me today. I needed to write.

I am losing my mind and a story is something I need badly.

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Sadness is an organ, for some people are born with it…

I just saw “The Hours” and it was heavy, intense and beautiful but in a sad way. Did i like it? I sure did. Because, i don’t know if it sounds weird but, i could relate to it in many ways. It is a sad thing to say i guess because no one should ever relate with a movie like that, but i do.

Truth is i wasn’t planning to watch the movie, i had Jodie Foster’s The Brave One ready for my movie night but i ended up watching this. I wanted to read the book first.

Sometimes when a story reminds me of what life really is and what life really never would be, i feel bad cause a troubled character in a story is in the end just a character, a fictitious person, but I’m for real.

Freedom is an abstract art…!!!!

Sometimes i feel like im living a pre programmed life, everyday i do the same things at almost same time without failing. I dont know if its a good thing or bad, because on a normal side of the scale people want a fixed routine work, home, work and on the not so normal side are people who getup with no plan for the day, who are spontaneous and who discover things by spending their days on sofas, at cafes, on a train or getting on a bus.

Half of my day is spent doing what i do everyday and rest half is spent wondering where do i belong…

Stubborn heart, acidic stomach, crazy head…LOL? Whatever!

I hate my acid reflux…ruins the day for me. What has my stubborn heart done to me. Look at all the things gone wrong with me, my stomach and my head are paying price for having a heart that won’t stop believing, won’t quit and won’t change.

Anyhow, I have started giving time to the books on my shelf. Am now reading a Lee Child’s Jack Reacher thriller “Gone Tomorrow”. I think my next book would be “Love letters to the dead” by Ava Dellaira. Some review site compared it to the “Perks of being a wallflower” and I love this one.

My mouth feels so metallic right now, not a good feeling and no amount of sweets can make it go. Fckn acid.

Got to go, goodnight world…!!!!

P.S Is ‘Orange is the new black’ any good? Am thinking of catching up with the show.