ME wasn’t Me always…

Tonight (again no reading or writing) i explore my windows phone. I have a windows phone and i still don’t know much about it. So today i download few apps and have been going through the phone like it’s someone else’s phone. Good news, now windows 8 people can use Instagram. Yay.

Imagine i create a Twitter account; i follow all my favourite TV and movie and non movie-TV people. And one fine day i see a picture upload from Ian Somerhalder and i click on the link and it says i can’t access because i don’t have Instagram…O COME ON. I mean Windows had no Instagram. I was like WHHAAA?

I had a good day for first half but after lunch i was like sleeping with my eyes open. Why won’t i sleep on time?

Tomorrow i have been invited to a b’day party of a colleague and I’m totally bailing on it with the power and ability to lie. I don’t want to spend 3-4 hours of my life with bunch of girls who would get all wasted, laugh, dance and make me wonder why can’t i be like them? Why I’m so uptight and why I’m so me? Not that I do not like ME. I love ME. I do, but sometimes my blues are so heavy that a part of me that wants to give up envies everyone around even the ones i don’t want to be like, no matter what.

I have to go. Why cant i just sleep on time, get up early for workout and drive to work on time and come back on time? Because that would be so not ME…

Goodnight World!

There is a world outside my world…!!!!

I have a postcard from Germany, it was given to me by one of our interns Eduard, and sometimes i look at the places on the postcard and wish i could be there. I imagine myself walking on the street or the promenade pictured on the postcard.

I should better go and sleep but im hungry. One more day before i can rejoice the freedom of not getting up early in morning. I want to make myself coffee and watch a Meg Ryan movie but i have Gotham tomorrow.  So i guess i have no option but to go sleep.

I’m kind of missing Snowy alot today; my room feels so empty and sad. Maybe that’s why i can feel tears threatening to fall out.

Goodnight world!

When a Superhero is looking for a White Flag…!!!!

I am not writing or reading…dont know why. Wednesday night I had a serious chat with my mother and I still cant believe what I told her. Its crazy but truth is honesty can never fight denial.
Its just no one will ever get it, no one will ever accept it. It hurts when people I love try to fix me, im not broken im not. I just have something to say, listen. Either hate me or accept me but dont tell me I need to grow up.

Tomorrow I plan to wake up early. Need to start workout.

I cant fight things and a part of me has accepted it which is why I find it hard to do things I love. My stories, my books.

Im in a phase where Dawn and Hope are both four letter words to me.

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