It’s 2:20 am Monday and I’m not sleepy, which is so not good…!!!!

I wanted to count stars but then I decided to go with few of my favorite things/people…

My person

My baby best friend (let’s call him Spiderman shall we)

The stories in my head

Characters I read about

My high school best friend

Agnes Obel

TV shows & fictional Characters

All the Meg Ryan and Winona Ryder movies

Jodie Foster

My Laptop and MS Word

My headphones and every song in my players

My All Stars

The world I zone out to

My new puppy who I hope would love me as much as Snowy did

Coffee

My car

Grey’s Anatomy

Dreams

Book shops

Trains

Virginia Woolf Quotes

Mississippi Mud Ice cream

Brandi Carlile

Ellen De Generes

Pickles

Indian food

Eiffel Tower

Walking

Crying

Singing in my car

You’ve Got Mail

Bouquet of newly sharpened pencils

My Tattoo

My book collection

ME…….

P.S Agnes Obel’s music is one of the many things keeping me afloat…

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French Political Prisoner with no French…!!!

It was a good weekend, because I had one of those very rare family movie day where I actually watch a movie in a theatre with my whole family. It’s a very rare phenomenon and very exhausting one but it always makes me feel a little happy, because of the very fact that we don’t do it much.

Apart from the family movie, I have had a weekend where I have spent lazy moments on my sofa with my book. Just pure laziness and book reading. I wrapped up Rose Under Fire.

This is my second Elizabeth Wein book, after reading Code Name Verity I fell in love with her writing. Rose Under Fire starts where Code Name Verity ends, so of course I was expecting to read more of Maddie but this one wasn’t about my favourite pilot Maddie, this was about another pilot who loves poetry as much as I love escaping into day dreams.

I admit, at one point when I realised it wasn’t about Maddie I felt little disappointed because a part of me still lives in page 285 of Code Name Verity but then soon I was drawn into Rose’s Ravensbrück journey.

This one is about French Political Prisoner 51498 with no French and Roza and Irina and Karolina and Lisette and Elodie and even Angel of Death Anna. My favourite scene was when they had to force Roza into that plane. Hard to believe that the worst pain in neck Roza, who wouldn’t even get scared when her name came on list, cried over a plane ride. O sweet snappy Rabbit.

O God! This was one of the most heartbreaking Concentration Camp fictions I’ve ever read. This wasn’t about Jewish prisoners; it was mostly about the other captives the political prisoners, the German criminals, the polish, the Russians and the French. The spys, the pilots, the rabbits.

I fell in love with crazy Roza, even more than the protagonist also named Rose. My heart broke when Maddie said Julie would have died there. O Julie!

Anna’s character was fiction but it wasn’t all that a story. People did terrible things in war but some of them were just unwilling participants who had no way out. Anna’s character kind of reminds me of this 93 years old Nazi guy on trail Oskar Gröning. Real story.

TELL THE WORLD

How they all longed to tell the world and even now the trail of Auschwitz SS Guard Oskar Gröning is about countering the Holocaust deniers. TELL THE WORLD.

My heart aches for the names on the wall of those camps across German captured cities.  And those who were never reported or documented or failed to get mourners because no one knew they died there. I’m just glad Eiffel Tower survived it all. My obsession with concentration camps or holocaust is largely because I feel that so many vanished and went away but no one would know their names, stories or who they were before being gassed, incinerated or shot or turned into lifeless corpse resulting starvation or diseases. Pilots, soldiers, mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, grandparents, kids and just harmless sympathizers of those being erased.

There is a world inside my head and rights and wrongs don’t belong in it…!!!!!

I’m writing a story that I won’t be able to share with anyone, yet I have started spending my nights working on it. Its a beautiful tale of finding love and family but no one would find this story because its only for  my eyes. Everyday at Gotham, I think of next page and next lines that i need to write when i’m back home. In some ways, I’m building a world of my own, with friends of my own.

This story, these characters and the world I’m creating might not get shared still it would make me happy if i can finish it. So, for once I’m putting a cap on the voices and the noises and the rights and wrongs and the morals.

Right and wrong can do whatever they want in real life, in my story there is no place for haters.

Maybe I should spend this time with the unfinished chapters from old stories that I know I wont have problem sharing with friends, but I want to work on this. See how it goes.

P.S I think I’m obsessed with Agnes Obel’s music…

Sadness is an organ, for some people are born with it…

I just saw “The Hours” and it was heavy, intense and beautiful but in a sad way. Did i like it? I sure did. Because, i don’t know if it sounds weird but, i could relate to it in many ways. It is a sad thing to say i guess because no one should ever relate with a movie like that, but i do.

Truth is i wasn’t planning to watch the movie, i had Jodie Foster’s The Brave One ready for my movie night but i ended up watching this. I wanted to read the book first.

Sometimes when a story reminds me of what life really is and what life really never would be, i feel bad cause a troubled character in a story is in the end just a character, a fictitious person, but I’m for real.

Dear Weekend, You and me could write a bad romance…

O well, its weekend and here im in my room at 3:30 am watching one show after another, sneaking leftovers from fridge and wondering why does it take so long for Friday to come…

My favorite time of the week...Friday night

My favorite time of the week…Friday night

Let me confess something, while everyone in my country is lately busy discussing and predicting the result of up coming big elections i am really not interested. Believe me i read news everyday, national and international, and i know what’s happening around the world but i don’t care who wins or who loses. Actually i have my vote ready and i know where will i put it but thing is when you are falling 200km/hr from high up above all you care about is pretty much your situation. So call me crazy.

I really need to sleep for i have a very busy day tomorrow. But i will watch another episode, spend some more time with myself, before i go dream some crazy dreams.

That reminds me, few days back i had a dream where i walked up to my bosses and told them nicely that im quitting. I just quit. No new job, no reason. I just quit from Gotham in my dream. Man! that happens only in movies. That kind of stuff is luxury in real world and it never happens. Not to people like me.

Got to go. Goodnight World!

P.S I know you know this but if i could be one fictional character i would choose Kathleen Kelly any day.