Dear George Mallory…!!!!

It took me sometime but i finally managed to finish “Love letters to the dead” and I’m ready for the new novel based on series “The Killing. Can’t wait. Love letters to the dead was more or like similar to “The perks of being a wallflower” but both the books have their own charm. A part of me relates to protagonists in both the books, for a moment there i couldn’t help but notice that Charlie was projection of my own self in a different way.

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I haven’t written letters to anyone for ages now. I used to, once. I truly was good with letters because i used to write letters to my friends, close friends. Letters with and without reasons. Funny how we grow up and everything changes because of experiences and time and life.

If i was to write a letter to a dead celebrity, like Laurel did in the book, i would choose George Mallory. When i read Paths of Glory all i wanted to know was what happened to him and his partner. I mean did they make it? Did he get to put his wife’s picture up there? What happened that day? Where is Andrew Irvine?

I’m nothing like George Mallory but his life fascinates me. His love for Ruth and Everest is amazing. If only i was that kind of person, with true motivation and hunger in me. If only, I was driven by a passion so deep, so true. I want to ask him, if he was scared when he fell? Did he felt lost? Cause i m scared all the time and I feel lost all the time. I wonder what Ruth must have gone through, not the part where she lost her man but the part where she didn’t even know what happened to him, did he or did he not get to make his dream come true? I’m obsessed with it, wonder if it bothered her and for how long? If only Mallory could know how his grandson followed his footstep and kept his legacy alive by reaching the Everest.

For me George Mallory and Amelia Earhart are two heroes, real heroes. I’m obsessed with their mysteries. I can only hope TIGHAR would one day find her plane. We can’t bring her back or know what exactly happened, but it would be like having a closure.

Dear Brittany Murphy…!!!!

I don’t know what I want from life, I really don’t know. Because I can’t seem to break out of my bubble and accept life the way people do, the way it should be. I am hiding in layers of denial with every cell in my body hoping for a movie like miracle to stop the world from crashing down on me, even though I know that’s how the story would end. I would be bulldozed by reality.

Sometimes I miss writing diaries because that’s where I can actually be all pitiful and pathetic. Well, truth is writing diary only would make me more sad because I would open up for real and I have seen every time I have tried to open up I couldn’t shut up. I remember when I once had a moment of truth sharing with a friend, it felt so good because I spoke my heart out about things hidden inside punching me from inside so they could just carve a hole and get out of me. For first few days I was happy I found someone to talk to and then I realized there was this need to talk and talk and talk every day every second of every hour. I realized it wasn’t good. All I wanted was to talk about myself and my pain, I just couldn’t think about anything else or anyone else.

There is this thing about pain, you have to share it to a level where you can feel better but that’s it. Releasing the years of pressure accumulated inside fast and quick would drown you and the other person in it.

Why can’t I just give up and be the world wants me to be, normal and uncomplicated?

I have started reading “Love letters to the dead” and its quiet similar to “The Perks of being a Wallflower” which is good in a way. I love the latter one. If I had to write a letter to a dead celebrity, I think I would choose Brittany Murphy because of Uptown Girls and Girl Interrupted. Being someone who spends a lot of time with fiction shows and movies, I have this thing with the characters. I love them so much that I wish they were for real.

I could also write to George Mallory because man I need to know what happened to him. Amelia Earhart.

I have to go now, I need to read and then sleep.

The more you sleep and rest the better you fake smile. True Story.

Goodnight world!

Stubborn heart, acidic stomach, crazy head…LOL? Whatever!

I hate my acid reflux…ruins the day for me. What has my stubborn heart done to me. Look at all the things gone wrong with me, my stomach and my head are paying price for having a heart that won’t stop believing, won’t quit and won’t change.

Anyhow, I have started giving time to the books on my shelf. Am now reading a Lee Child’s Jack Reacher thriller “Gone Tomorrow”. I think my next book would be “Love letters to the dead” by Ava Dellaira. Some review site compared it to the “Perks of being a wallflower” and I love this one.

My mouth feels so metallic right now, not a good feeling and no amount of sweets can make it go. Fckn acid.

Got to go, goodnight world…!!!!

P.S Is ‘Orange is the new black’ any good? Am thinking of catching up with the show.