If only you’ve had preferred pen over politics!!!!

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Ironically, this is true…great liars are also great magicians.. Hitler had the skills to be counted among great authors & writers in history, if only he hadn’t been obsessed with politics and antisemitism. Crazy, but some of the most infamous men in history have been highly intellectual minds…

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Maybe there is life on an another planet & maybe they know its wise to stay away from us…!!!!

I think the only people who stay with us till the end are the characters we meet in the books we read. Last night i finished reading Torn Thread, a book based on a story of a 12 year old girl’s experience in a Nazi camp. Holocaust stories, real or fiction, often make me wonder how low humanity went.

I may not understand the complexity of religion and politics and old wars the world went through, but the ugly naked truth behind stories of people who died, or lived to talk about it, breaks my heart. When i read a holocaust book i don’t see a Jewish girl or boy or woman being denied life in Auschwitz, i see kids and women being brutally murdered.

Torn Thread is another book of courage, hope, faith, sisterhood, pain and dark truth of the good and bad we have become. I loved the book. I did.

When i finished reading it i couldn’t help but wonder how much resemblance it bears to Moon at Nine. Yes, i know the latter is a story of innocent love in the wrong era and the former is a story of sisterhood and struggle in a painful era. But both the books had true stories with nations at war and young protagonists who suffered and were made to pay the consequences of their existence.

We don’t need another planet, we are not meant to be civilized. We merely breath and procreate as we stamp over the privilege of being the only living beings in a lonely world of empty planets.

All we do is struggle and work hard to afflict pain on the weaker ones. We are not human beings god created us to be. We are broken parts of the good and bad left behind in the war of religion and politics. That’s what we are.

Dear Weekend, You and me could write a bad romance…

O well, its weekend and here im in my room at 3:30 am watching one show after another, sneaking leftovers from fridge and wondering why does it take so long for Friday to come…

My favorite time of the week...Friday night

My favorite time of the week…Friday night

Let me confess something, while everyone in my country is lately busy discussing and predicting the result of up coming big elections i am really not interested. Believe me i read news everyday, national and international, and i know what’s happening around the world but i don’t care who wins or who loses. Actually i have my vote ready and i know where will i put it but thing is when you are falling 200km/hr from high up above all you care about is pretty much your situation. So call me crazy.

I really need to sleep for i have a very busy day tomorrow. But i will watch another episode, spend some more time with myself, before i go dream some crazy dreams.

That reminds me, few days back i had a dream where i walked up to my bosses and told them nicely that im quitting. I just quit. No new job, no reason. I just quit from Gotham in my dream. Man! that happens only in movies. That kind of stuff is luxury in real world and it never happens. Not to people like me.

Got to go. Goodnight World!

P.S I know you know this but if i could be one fictional character i would choose Kathleen Kelly any day.

Have you seen my awesomeness? Can’t find it…

So i had a bad Sunday with some really weird kind of Nervous breakdown or whatever it was. Was bad, really bad and i cant even tell you what all went inside my head. But im all okay now. Okay but pissed because yesterday some moron banged his scooter right in my car. Some really crazy girls were trying to cross the road without looking at the traffic, so i had to press BRAKE for them but the scooter guy doesn’t get to do the same and BANG.

My poor car has had some really bad time in past 2 years, poor car i must say.

Today i really missed my diaries, so much that at one point i almost made my up mind about buying a brand new diary and pen to start writing. But then i realised i shouldn’t. A part of me is tempting me to go back to writing diaries but I’m not sure if it’s a good idea to go back to old habits.

Good thing i have been sleeping early and playing every day for past 2-3 days. But whoever said that a good 8 hours sleep and exercise is good for depression didn’t knew me or was never depressed. You know i always believed that my blues were the reason i wrote stories but i guess i was wrong because i cant write anymore. Weird i cant even read.

and 124...phew...i still feel bad...

and 124…phew…i still feel bad…

Lately, everyone is discussing the politics around because of the whole election season but i kind of have no opinion. Its like i dont care about anything.

I think i have lost my mojo. I cant feel my awesomeness or anything even remotely close to it plus i dont even feel like dancing on my bed with loud music. Man! that’s the worst.

Well done Mr. President…High Five ;) !!!!

Problem with me is that when I’m not well physically my brain starts working in a strange manner. I know same happens with everyone else, because a body is a body, right? Maybe. In my case, I end up in a situation where my lovely twisted mind starts thinking of every hurtful thing unrelated to the existing day or moment, irrespective of the fact how good the day or how fine the moment is.

When I’m unwell physically, my mind starts throwing things that hurt me right at me. Thoughts and memories from pasts, possible mess from future and everything to just ruin a perfectly normal day, because I’m unwell. How was the day? Bummer.

Well good thing, Obama won. Well done Mr. President…High five 🙂

I’m one of those people (I don’t know if there are people like me) who do not, will not and just cannot fight for my religion. I define religion as faith in something bigger, so you can hold on to it when feeling a wreck. Something you can believe in for there is no possible way a person like you can get family so nice, friends so amazing and health and freedom to live. That’s where I draw line for my religion. I will not and would not ever feel bad if someone mocks my definition because that’s for me. I do not understand many things in the world, because I have issues big time and I rarely have time to be the brilliant smarty pants who knows it all. I dont know thing about politics, commerce or changing the world, but i just cant dislike a person for things like color, religion and so on.

But I’m no saint either; I must have made many racial comments when i was young or unaware of what it meant until now. I may still, unknowingly, end up mocking someone but I don’t think I am in a position to judge anyone, because I too live in a house of glass.

Freedom to live without being judge on your colour, religion, caste, sexuality and country is priceless. What Obama can do for giving this freedom is what Romney can’t even think of. I may never rejoice my definition of freedom, because freedom comes with a price and I can’t really afford it, so I live in an illusion of freedom. For everyone who voted for Obama, dude nice one. And for those who didn’t, there is more to the world than just economy, business and commerce. And congratulations Tammy Baldwin.

Change is not a light bulb you get to see in a flick of a finger…!!!

I don’t know if I made any sense today…I’m so not in a good mood. Sad thing about being sad is when you are standing alone behind closed doors with tears; there is no one to tell you how ugly you look in tears. So you continue crying…!!!

I so want to work on Dominique today but i guess i will have to lock up the Author of Dominique and push the Author of Jane Doe out on field.

P.S if you are a Romney fan please do not mind my words. Im not anti Romney, im just pro Obama.

Little likes 15th August…!!!!

Before I go on writing about how was the day, I would like to ask you guys is WordPress asking you to approve your own comments? It is asking me…really. Every time I reply to one your comment, it goes to “Approval waiting” category and I have to approve my own comment. True Story.

15th August is a big day for two reasons…A – its Independence Day for everyone in my country, B – It’s my hero’s birthday day.

Till last year I was a very patriotic person, I still am but now it’s minus the word “Very”. Every year we celebrate independence and I get to hear stories of how soldiers and freedom fighters gave up their life to build a free country. I do not know why two nations fight but I do know that being a nation with freedom to live the way you want (almost) is priceless. I may be one of those few Indians who do not know much about my own heritage, culture and history but I do know that it took us years and lots of soldiers to reach where are today.

There is no word to describe the whole sacrifice and the endless efforts of army guys serving day and night on the cold and rough borders of Kashmir and Siachen and Drass and other places. I come from an army background, my dad has been on the border too and now my brother wishes to join Indian army. So the whole patriotism is in my DNA, so much that I almost made up my mind about joining too.

So what happened to the “Very” factor? Long story. I don’t know. I think my anger and agony has overshadowed every feeling I ever had. But I still love my country and a lot many things about it. And irrespective of the country, who doesn’t like to live in a free and democratic nation. Democracy and freedom to think and talk is pretty important. When I read “A thousand splendid suns” I started valuing independence even more. 65 years of freedom is still not big and we have a long way to go to get grip of changing times, but it’s also a long way from zero.

Salute to every soldier who fought for his country.

Unlike every other year when I wore a flag or bought one, this year i celebrated my independence day with ice-cream.

Also since it was the happy birthday day of love of my life, an ice-cream was important. Year 2000 15th august was the day when Snowy came home. He wasn’t born today but he came to us on this day and so we mark it as his birthday.

Tiny little doggie looking at us with two very round and scary eyes. I had have never seen anything so small, so beautiful and so cute. I never thought I would fell in love with this tiny miny four leggy awesome furry thing. Snowy has become a major part of our life, like a family member. Everyone at my place is always busy with him.

I think I mentioned this before I like to say “I love you” to him. I often tell him that he is awesome, I do not care if he has no idea what I’m talking bout. He takes me for granted; he is a naughty crazy kid who likes to take all the attention from everyone in the family. He hates posing for camera and he likes to follow my mom from one room to another.  Sometimes when he wants to be alone and sleep, I sit next to him and tell him what’s worrying me (of course he looks at me with “dude! Nap time” eyes. 🙂  )

Last year when he got sick, it tore me apart. Only I know what it felt to see him in pain and the day he got operated was the most difficult day of my life because he is so tiny and he couldn’t even tell us “that I don’t like the doctor guy or that it hurts”. I can’t see him hurt or in pain. I don’t think it’s easy to forget those few days ever. He is old very old and it worries me day and night, I don’t like to talk about it (among many other things I prefer to keep to me).

Happy Birthday my love, thank you for coming to us. 🙂