Its late and I have morning badminton plans, so I won’t write much. Plus, right now I’m speechless.
Because people I just wrapped up Jane Doe. Officially my story is complete, yes there is hell of editing and days and days of re-reading but the story is wrapped up.
I feel happy, emotional and proud of my dark and twisted brain. I maybe broken beyond repair but I just complete my freakng story.
Time to sleep. Tonight I sleep with a smile on my face, maybe few tears of joy too.
Before I start with my episode and continue work on Jane Doe, I want to say something. Today I got salary raise and it makes me more than happy, it makes me super happy because no matter how screwed i’m with life at the end I’m not a complete loser. I work hard every day in Gotham but I never thought anybody cared.
I may not be the daughter my mom wished she had but i still made her little proud today which means a lot to me. I also missed my mentor and best friend a lot today because she is a major reason behind everything I do at work, she taught me all of it. My loved ones are disappointed with me at some corner of their heart and I know it very well but I also know today they are happy. I may act super self obsessed with “I’m Awesome” as my pet line but I have no confidence in me and so, today, I told myself silently that despite the darkness I have done good, despite the pain I have managed well. I wanted to be hugged but I managed with self pep talk.
To reach this day is in itself an accomplishment for me because I know the journey. It was a good day today, while it began with a big headache it turned out to be just awesome. Also had one of those rare family outings which added to the whole awesomeness.
Club cant even handle me right now…!!!!
Every other day when I cry myself to sleep I wonder if there is any reason to have hope and faith. Even today as I smile and dance inside my head I feel the dagger but I am happy. I’m not loser.
So finally weekend is here and for next two days I have just Jane Doe on my plate. Write write write.