America you nailed it cause equality is dope!!!!

Before I start, I am going say it out loud I saw Pitch Perfect today and I have no idea why it took me so long. It’s awesome. Being a Glee fan it’s no news that I love modern musicals.

So, America big day? Love is love and Ireland and USA are just where the world is looking at right now. Some with hope and others…well haters gonna hate. But it’s just amazing how we as humans are evolving and accepting that EQUALITY is not just a word. It’s a real thing.

And for those who wonder if they ever would see that word, its okay to be not okay. Sun takes time to shine, its dawn for people in America for now. World is taking baby steps and one day it would become what it was intend to be, at first place. One day world would be a free place with equality for everyone.

Right now, its 3 am the ghostly hour and I have so many things inside my head. I want to sit and talk to someone for hours, not listen but talk. Sometimes I really wish that the whole 3 am ghost thing would come true and some ghostly thing would come to scare me, I would make him or her sit and talk. I mean that’s the least he or she can do before scaring the crap out of me. Plus, ghosts won’t share your dirty twisty life stories with other people.

I’m just glad its weekend. What did I learned from past 3 days?

Gotham is turning more and more into Hunger Games and I feel less of Batman and more of Katniss Everdeen. I can literally picture myself with a bow and arrow while fighting for survival.

But then I can’t be Katniss Everdeen she is way too cool and I am one of those girls in the chick flicks who want to be friend with the cool girls. I’m not cool, I’m the girl who wants to be noticed by and be friends with cool ones. I’m not nerdy I’m just boring cause I don’t do the socially accepted definition of fun things.

BTW Anna Kendrick is so cool. Now I need to watch the part two.

I should go now cause I’m afraid one day God would fire a miracle gun towards me turn my life into everything I want, make me peachy and sunshine and rainbow, but I would not be able to cherish the Hey-I’m-Happy thing cause I would be dead courtesy lack of sleep. I read somewhere the amount of sleep deprivation that you give your body can never be recovered. Damn! Well I’m not here to sleep. I’m here to make faces at empty walls and wonder if only I was an artist. I’m here to wonder, sleep can wait.

Good night world and congratulations to America.

 

 

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You don’t need a degree to know what love is…!!!!!

Have you ever felt love in a way that it belongs to you that you were meant to find it, doesn’t matter if it wasn’t yours to keep? When i see people i realize something, there is no such thing as one love. Because everyone grows up loving different people at different phases of their lives only to end with one person who stays for long, really long. But each and every phase of that love felt right to them, whether it was a school crush, a high school love story, a college romance or marriage.

I personally believe love is meant to find everyone, even the most worthless of us who lost it or never kept it or never got to know it for good.

That’s the beauty of love it never forgets to say Hi to us; we might grow up to be a different person but we all get that turn once where we brush our shoulder with it. Some get to be friends with it, some become acquaintances and others walk by and never get to greet it again.

A peace of mine would always remember my turn. Some days when I’m all sunshine because i have no energy to crib anymore, i tell myself maybe there is another turn maybe i should just keep walking and we would meet again, love and me. And if we don’t, i would still be someone who once did get to say hello to it. Because honestly speaking things happen to you in ways you cant expect them to or want to.

I’m kind of peachy right now…so folks, enjoy the moment of Little being peachy…i think its the dancing. I went to a party tonight, where everyone was wearing dresses and i was in my denim and blue shirt and All Stars. I danced so much, i was dancing with people, i was dancing alone, i was dancing. And maybe that’s why i feel rosy and peachy.

Sing me a lullaby…!!!!

I wanted to write about something today but now i cant think about it. huh! what was it? Anyhow, i want to tell you all something. I love my phone, i do. There i said it. Every since mobile phones became the thing to buy, i have had bought so many of them. No, not because im rich but i just happen to have been an owner of a new phone almost every other year. Strange i know.

But this one, the one i have right now, has to be the one that i would not part with easily. Nokia’s music app is killing me with happiness and music.

I still don’t remember what i wanted to talk about. What was it?

I want to meet a stranger, fall in love, go travel, get drunk, write a love poem and actually hand it over, wake up to a face every day, dance to crazy teen songs while pasting pictures of someone on the walls of my room, practice smiles in mirror and look at the stars only say they are beautiful. I want to be happy, head over heels and in love like every other normal person is. I want to walk out of the cloud of darkness and glitter in the sunshine of happiness.

Even that’s not what i wanted to write, but that’s just something i say every day to myself hoping one day it would come true. Cause you have to fight, you just have to be Kathleen Kelly and throw some punches in the air and say “Fight, Fight, Fight” or Capt. Karen Emma Walden with “No Surrender” attitude. Yes, I love Meg Ryan 😀 guilty as charged.

I think the week has been too exhausting and that’s why i forgot what i wanted to say.  I have to go because i have a S.J Bolton book to finish.

Man! i need some sleep. Anyhow, today i was running and this thought came to about how glad im for music and what if there was no music in the world. I tried to imagine and i almost died imagining because ever since i have slipped in to my darkness music is one big thing keeping intact. yes, there are other things, there are friends too but i am so glad world has music. When im with my headphones im often a person you would like. Truth is if you’ve had met me in another place, another world chances are you would have loved me because im a fun person deep down somewhere i think.

Okay! now I’m really shutting up my babbling. Somebody make me sleep.

Goodnight world!

!!!

Love quoting from Meg Ryan’s movies…

It was a decent sunshine Sunday. Makes me happy because I keep thinking of last Sunday when the thoughts inside my head went as dark as possible.

Feel like Meg’s character Capt. Karen Emma Walden from Courage Under Fire, as I hear myself say “No Surrender” even when I know its a lost battle.

Happy Monday to all and Goodnight!!

Every story needs a bad-ass villian

If i a have choice to be born as someone else, i would probably not take it because i have had a good life so far and the people i have in my life are my life. But, some days i do wonder what if i had choice to not be me.

Lying all day all night, pretending and faking has made me a bitter and mean person which kind of hurts people and me too. I realise how i have become the bad guy among people in my life, directly and indirectly. Either they don’t know this maybe or they are just not sure how to fix it. I wasn’t this bad-ass mean person; i was once a girl who was nicer. Before i became the misfit, before i found out why i always was different, before i found how i can never be a part of sunshine world, before i realized how i am two different person in one body – one is what im and one is for what people want to see. Before all this, i was quite a nice little girl with not a single bone of meanness inside her.

Since im kind of cranky right now, i think i shouldn’t write much so im going to leave two songs i discovered and cant stop listening to. The one by Lesley Roy is probably written for me. I think even if i delete everything and just upload this one song, you would get my state of mind cause the lyrics are just i want to say.

This second one is probably way better than the original one. I think this guy has sung better than Bob Dylan and Adele. I cant stop listening to this one even though i am all Hulk right now. Right now, i feel like Kathleen Kelly from that scene where she closes her shop, walks home and sits alone in a corner with a soup bowl wondering where to go from there, feeling all lost and beaten by universe.

Is Superman allowed to be scared of flying?

My room and my car are two of my most favorite places on this planet, because i feel safe when im with myself. That is the saddest thing to say but its the story of my life.

Another sad thing about life is that im scared of doing things i love. Its second day of NaNoWriMo and i still haven’t written a word. I blame it on the fact that i have no internet connection, but truth is im avoiding writing for no reason. The writing thing is just one of many things im scared to go for. I wont even go mentioning other stuff because it would make me sound crazy to my own ears. A part of me wonders how much damaged im, because some nights i hide in my sheets and cry myself to sleep and then there are days im all sunshine, dancing on my bed for no reason.

Fact is im scared of being happy, of being sad, of being scared, of being angry all the time…im scared of every emotion that i feel.

Im even scared of getting another dog. I wonder why cant i be that girl in Gotham who i don’t like. I mean sometimes even she seems way saner than me. I mean, yes, she is crazy in her ways but i think being her would be better than being me. All she worries about is her nails, her hair, her shopping, her looks, her dresses and her being center of attention all the time. Here im dark and twisted, scared of doing things i love or want, crying all alone,wanting to be alone and believing in and hoping for a miracle.

I really don’t know why im writing all this, because truth be told right now my mood is all good. In fact the whole festival and extended weekend thing has made me a bright shiny bulb. But i still cant stop wondering why im scared of writing the story i have on my mind. Why im scared of things that make me happy?

Happy but thoughtful…!!!!

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Little is awesome but Little cant, just cant, sleep on time…

Well guess what…i have the title for my story for NaNoWrimo even though I’m still not sure if i can work but hey i have a story, a name and a song. Can do lot with those three things.

Once a class mate from college said that she noticed something in my stories, she said that every story i have written has someone dying in it. True. I don’t know why i never noticed that before but maybe it’s because i write suspense and tragedy together. Most of my stories are drama with darkness in them. A friend of mine was, few days ago, discussing a show with me and said that she finds that little too dark and i realised isn’t that what i write.

Maybe i could have been a happy writer if life would have been different but then i realise if life was sunshine i wouldn’t have been a writer at all. I found writing when i realised im different from everyone.

Today im so tightly wrapped around my darkness, my truth and the pain that it is hard to imagine a life without it. I mean a Sunny Shiny Me? How weird would that be?

I wish i could remember my first story but i don’t. I do remember that i started writing in 9th grade, poems, stories and my daily diaries. Because i was an angry and lone teenager back then who always used to be  fight at home and feel that her family doesn’t care. Not true. My anger is still alive but now i know why im angry and at whom. Im not angry at my parents or my brother or my friends, im angry at the world in general for it is biased and racist and judgmental and lives on rules carved on stones.

My most favourite poem, as written by me, is titled Castle and i think i still have it somewhere. Also What’s my Diagnosis? Is one of my favourite poems. I like Jane Doe but i think my favourite story would be Dominique or Crossroads, if and ever i got to finish them.

I have an idea; i am going to create a different page now with my poems. I don’t write much poems but i do have few that i am proud about.

Voices: Hey Writer Girl

Me: What?

Voices: We think you made your point

Me: And what would that be?

Voices: You love writing. And you are awesome. Seriously?

Voices: Are you going to make a song on it next? A love song for you by you…maybe?

Me: Rude

Voices: Boring and Creepy and Weird…really very weird…

Me: What do you want?

Voices: Didn’t you just book online movie tickets for tomorrow evening?

Me: So?

Voices: Hmm, nothing just…

Me: what?

Voices: Its 2:15 am, you will sleep by 2:30, get up late, go late and that would mean…

Me: Feck…that would mean i won’t be able to leave on time for my movie.

Voices: Whoa! You do have a brain. You should use it more often.

Me: I should get a lobotomy

Voices: Because?

Me: You guys live in there

Voices: Whatever…2:18 am…Tick Tock Tick…

Me: AAAaahhh….aaah smiley

 

 

Drumroll…..500th Post…!!!!!

Cheers

Cheers

Little Miss Obsessive’s Anatomy is special for, its my diary, my mind, my place and i look forward to writing something, anything every day.

Today is the 500th post day which is crazy, unbelievable and awesome. Wow. So Wow.

Little is so thankful to each and everyone who follows, who likes, who reads and who passes by the blog. This is a virtual land painted by various colours of my mood, blue, sunshine, rainbow, dark, crazy, twisty and awesome.

As you can see i have changed the theme and here is the new addition to my blog – a new page – Random People in Little’s Phone

 

Little was a sunshine today…call the paparazzis…!!!

Today things changed, I woke up happy and smiley. Drove to work happy, singing out loud in my car, while enjoying the lovely rain. I was working with a smile on my face all day, even when I ended up in a 4 hours long meeting with my back aching I was happy. I thought this is it now my going to sulk but I didn’t; I walked out of Gotham happy. Bought me ice-cream and drove home singing along Sara Bareilles.

This is what freedom does to you. The thought of freedom made me a sunshine all day and I almost died of happiness because Friday night is here.

Right now I’m sitting all alone in my room with laptop and headphones feeling so much better, so much. Right now, right here I’m all real, all true and all me…no pretenses.

Today we, my family and I, were discussing Snowy. We were talking about him remembering his funny moments, how naughty he was his usual habits and how he used to run out of the house when our mom used to go out. He loved her a lot and would sit on the door all day to wait for her to come back, whenever she wasnt home. I found it easy this time, to talk about him. I usually can’t talk about him. Even mentioning his name can bring tears to my eyes. But it felt good to talk about him and smile at the memories.

So I’m going to leave you with Glee version of Soul Sister for I love glee and Darren Criss is awesome.

I’m missing Glee, probably because I have just watched so many of its songs on Youtube. This show will always be special to me. Will spend some more time with Glee’s amazing musical numbers.

Got to go now. Goodnight world!