All i needed to do was get awesome grades & become a rocket scientist…!!!!

Last night, I saw this Charlize Theron movie “Monster” and dude I can’t believe how much I cried at the end. I mean yes, the character was dark, bad and a killer and I’m suppose to not like it but the story was so tragic.

Have you ever used your sweater’s or sweatshirt’s sleeves as tissue paper while you were crying your eyes out seeing a sad movie? Ya me neither…I’m just asking. Who does that? I never did that? Okay, I do that. Whatever.

A,nyhow, so I woke up all blue and I just wanted to stay in the bed all day and not talk to anyone because a part of me was trying to do that “World doesn’t care” thing. But I had to get up, wear my “Wassup people. How you doin?” face and take my guests for shopping to the city. While they were out I was sitting in my car with a takeaway cappuccino (You can’t take me for a drive without my morning coffee) and reading my book. I played the “Girl with the car” today and drove them around. I’m so glad that I live in a city that is still bearable when it comes to traffic and crazy number of cars on the road. Though some days it’s so bad that everywhere there is a long jam but luckily there are also days like today, when I get to cruise around without a break. I love driving. Hate the “Take guests to shopping” part but love driving.

Indian guests are kind of difficult, they kind of become owner of the house during their stay.

Basically I spent all my day driving with my kind of music in car. The driving made me happy and then I got to meet a friend I was missing a lot for past few days especially since the Gotham incident. Well, what can I say:

Sometimes even after waking up on the wrong side of the bed, a day can be surprisingly beautiful…

coff

coffbook

But it makes me sad that tomorrow I have to get up again, wear the same “Wassup people. How you doin” face and spend 9 hours looking at my screen wondering “Why couldn’t I study hard and become a scientist or an astronaut”…Who asked me to become a writer? Oh! Wait…I was born as a writer…I was born this way.

The writer in me is the real me, everything else is a lie…!!!!

NaNo makes me feel like I’m back in school…if I waste time, I feel guilty. Am almost 23K and I could have crossed 25K,but I waste time.

O and I can’t stay away from Glee or Grey’s Anatomy. I didn’t get much of Glease but loved Grey’s Anatomy today. Both the shows have made me smile because my favorite characters are back…almost.

So right now I have a feeling my life is screwed to a level I can’t explain but I feel happy at this second. Why? Because I’m writing and living as myself. I’m me when I’m writing and when I’m not, well am someone I’m not. Real me is alive when I write, I tell stories and picture characters. Rest, everything else about me is unreal a lie. Because I’m not what anybody sees. I have a story which I live through my stories, ofcourse changing facts or that wouldn’t be a story…it would become biography.

3AM and I have words to write. I could have worked before not wasted time, but even in school my mind worked only when I was on verge of failing.

Guess life changes we don’t.

My mom is coming back tomorrow. I would never say this to her, but I missed her and my brother too.

Sometimes I have urge to talk to someone about things but I know if I opened up I won’t stop. Happened before and I realised how I couldn’t stop it. I wanted talk about my miseries everyday. It gets heavy on the other person, I realised it and decided something should just stay inside and die inside.

Oh and I think I need a haircut, but then I don’t have time. And I need sweaters. Am hungry too at 3AM, wish I could get me coffee. And am babbling.

I better go now. Looking forward to meet my old college friend tomorrow. We were like a gang back then. I miss college sometimes but then I realised I looked horrible with braces and the worst haircut of my life.
Babbling again. Fck.

Goodnight world!