Some days you end up standing face to face with truth and you realize no matter how many songs of Dawn, miracles and faith you sing to yourself, you ain’t getting the light you waiting for.
Tag Archives: Dawn
Note to 2014…I dig Happy Endings !!!!! – Part2
I know I’m supposed to be asleep by now, as per my resolution list. I did nothing from my list of things I want to do with New Year on the horizon, except evening jog in freakin cold weather.
I had four days off from Gotham and I can’t believe vacation is over. I don’t know if 2014 is going to be a great year, because I can never say that about any year. I can only hope it’s the year when I get Dawn. You know I felt the same about 2013 or 2012 but alas I am still waiting.
I don’t have speeches about how 2013 did things for me and how I expect amazing things from 2014, because at the end it’s me. I’m happy now, blue next moment. But yes, 2013 was a year with so much happening. It took Snowy from me something I would never forget no matter what year comes and goes. I lost a friend and 2013 would never leave my memory.
2013 was also the year, when I sent my story to publishing houses. That’s like crossing a check point in my bucket list. Yeah! I know I ain’t a published writer and might never be. But I took a step. Huge step. It’s like a big thing for me, to write and complete a novel and send it to a publication house. Big thing. Makes me feel proud of me. Only thing I have to cherish when it comes to my achievements because most of the time I’m drowning in self pity.
I don’t know if 2014 is going to good or bad…I do know I have another turn on my route to Dawn. I can only hope and have faith this turn would bring me closer to happiness, love, truth, freedom and myself.
I wanted to be so many thing when I was growing up, even a house wife at one point, but today right now all I want to be is Happy. And I would like to believe 2014 is the year I would get that…happiness.
I’m scared of 2014 like i was scared of 2013 or the year before, but lets just keep that between you and me and let 2014 think i am Awesome…!!!! 🙂
Happy New Year to all of you 🙂 😀
Little misses her little dog…!!!!
I might get my Dawn but i wont ever have you back in my life…i miss you everyday…I miss you trying to fall all over the laptop to get my attention, i miss your happy and jumpy welcome on entering the house, i miss your stubbornly cute face when you had to have what i was eating…i miss everything…i miss you so so much.
Some days, like right now, your absence hits like a sucker punch. Its sad that i can have everything in life, even the most impossible ones like freedom from blues, happy ending and my dawn but what i cant EVER have is you back in my life, what i cant have is all those years of you and me growing up together all over again.
Little has a crush on young Robert De Niro, but she is still team Jodie Foster…!!!!
It was a very very busy and exhausting day at Gotham, infact this whole week has been tiring. And, unfortunately, there are still two more days to go before I get my weekend. I dont know if I can make it another two days.
I need a haircut, a weekend, a day in my room, an episode marathon, some writing, loud music, cup of nice coffee, book shopping…that’s it for now.
Truth is my list of things I need or want is pretty big, but I cant even make it as small as one word.
If I can get my dawn, I think I will be okay. But freedom comes with a cost and I dont think I can afford my independence.
On a brighter note, let me tell you something that you didnt know. I saw “Taxi Driver” and Its lot different from the kind of movies I see but Robert De Niro blew my mind. Im all team Jodie Foster. The woman is role model and a brilliant actress. Period. But when I saw Taxi Driver, my eyes were soley on Robert De Niro. Okay firstly his work was really nice and secondly he looks so bloody good looking. I have never seen any of his old movies, so I have never seen him young. Young De Niro can beat any guy today.
Yes the movie was little too dark but the work put in by Robert and Jodie is brilliant. Not my kind of cinema but good cinema. My kind of dark movies are Girl Interrupted and Suckerpunch.
Got to go now.
Goodnight world!
P.S tell me names of old movies that are worth watching. I have heard about Breakfast at Tiffanys is good.
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Versatile Blogger Award…!!!!
Sometimes i wonder about the singer behind a beautiful sad song…wondering if the heart and voice behind the song is sad too?
Anyhow, its Friday here and so i have something awesome to share. I have been nominated for Versatile Blogger Award by Make Somethings Monday.
She is talented, creative and totally knows how to make Mondays awesome. Thankyou Megan for the honor 🙂
Here are the rules for the award:
1. Add to award certificate on your blog.
2. Announce your win with a post and thank the blogger who nominated you.
3. Nominate 15 deserving bloggers with the award.
4. Link your nominees in the post and let them know of their nomination with a comment.
5. Post 7 interesting things about yourself.
Now i wouldn’t be awarding nominees in any order and would like to dedicate and send it to each one of you.
Seven Things about me:
1 – My favorite fictional character has to be Kathleen Kelly.
2 – I truly believe i would cease to exist if somebody took away music from me.
3 – I want to learn “moon walk”, just cant get it right.
4 – Im very emotional about dogs. Seeing a sad dog or one in pain kills me.
5 – I call my day of freedom from blues as “Dawn”, which i would like to believe is not a myth.
6 – I think my mom is Awesome but i never tell her.
7 – I cant watch Eight Below, Hachiko, Courage Under Fire, The boy in the stripped pyjamas again…specially the first two movies. I love them, i just cant get to the end without crying.
When a writer inside a person dies, you don’t call an ambulance, you change the music…!!!!
It was a weird day because i was sleepy, low, bored and uninterested in everything. I kept telling myself it’s because I’m not well (caught a stomach infection) but truth is i was in a dull mode for no reason. Guess I’m exhausted from being sick for sure and then the work and the fact that I haven’t had my cup of coffee for past 3 days now.
Good news Weekend is here. You know when i was low and blue today i missed my stories, i did. I just hope this weekend i spend some time writing. I can’t give up on things i like, on my beliefs and my dawn, even if its all a sinking boat. What’s that song by Passenger “i AM NOT GONNA ROCK THIS BOAT CAUSE SEA DOESN’T KNOW MY NAME”.
I have a busy day tomorrow with the German translator coming for a day, so i better go. I am dying for a cup of ice-cream, chocolate one. Dark chocolate ice-cream by Baskin Robins. O man i miss good food.
Happy Friday to All and Goodnight World!
All I needed was a hug, but I managed with Uptown Girls…!!!!
Sometimes a part of me tell me to grow up and accept things and the fact that there is no Dawn.
Have you ever watched a movie in a movie hall without even watching it? Like you are looking at the screen but you arent actually watching it.
Today I went for this sad romantic Hindi movie with my friend. When the movie got over I saw two girls on our right crying with tears flowing…real tears. Then I realised they were not the only one crying. A couple sat hand in hand, girl in tears and many more were busy grieving the death of the hero in the movie who committed suicide leaving the heroine alone to live a better life, for she deserved better.
So when I told my friend (who was watching this movie for the second time) that there wasnt a single scene when I felt like crying she looked around and jokingly called me insensitive. We laughed and walked out.
Truth is I wasnt even there during the movie, my mind was lost. How I wish I could tell my friend that I didnt cry because I have already cried for the day. I cried when I was taking shower to get ready, when I was tying my shoe laces, when I was combing my hair….i cried alot even more than those girls in the cinema hall.
Truth is I wish I could tell them that hero’s suicide didnt make me sad cause I was angry at him for doing so, cause I had a thought like that today.
Im not insensitive am broken and drowning.
Today life hit me with reality again. Truth that miracles, dawn and happy endings are part of a world I dont belong to.
I have to go, but am okay now. Feeling so much better after watching Uptown Girls. I cried again when the movie finished but these were tears of happiness. I love this movie. Love Brittany Murphy in this movie.
Goodnight world!!
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I have a victory song…just waiting for my Dawn!!!!
I have a song ready for the day I will get my independence…its my victory song. Tounge Tied by Grouplove. I will dance like crazy on the the day I get my dawn, but problem is I dont know if I will ever get my freedom. My independence day would be the day I get to say goodbyes to the lies,fear,pretending and emptiness.
But then it is always good to be ready. You never know when life gives what you want…right? Plus, im hopelessly in love with the idea of bumping into a miracle one day on a corner of life.
Im a depressed soul who breathes on dreams, hope and vision of a dawn…the day of sunshine.
Goodnight world
And so it continues from day to night, dusk to dawn….!!!!
Everyday while staring at my computer trying to make sense of things, i promise myself i would sleep early tonight. I swear no more episodes and only bed time reading. I promise i wont sit in front of Youtube and do nothing but click Play. I promise i would write a page or two of Jane Doe and review. I promise i would wake up and play or workout.
Every night as i sit gloomy and tired in my bed staring at my laptop wondering why i feel what i feel, i play episodes after episodes to drown myself into another life. I dive into world of Youtube to find songs and videos to keep my mind away. I look at the blank word document wondering what on earth could i write or review when i cant feel the story. I beg myself to not wake up early for i don’t care if i get fat or whatever.
And so it continues from day to night, dusk to dawn….!!!!
i feel like a faker…!!!!
I had a bad day and I don’t know what to say if you have a question ‘why?’, because nothing happened.
Today I’m at a bad place mentally, I’m the girl I was before I believed in hope and dawn. I wanted to and I still want to talk about it to someone but I don’t want to worry anyone.
Right now I’m reading “the perks of being a wallflower”. I don’t want this book to end, ever. I like it so much. I will explain why I like this book once I finish it which would make me sad, but then again I’m already sad.
“I feel like a faker”…its a line from this book and I was wondering if it was for me.
Got to go, goodnight world!
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Little miss obsessive's anatomy!! 